He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize