Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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