it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
operation have a gay friend backfired
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You are the jesus of drinking
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
