is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
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