Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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