Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
