i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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