Farmville is her only friend.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
