she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
