Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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