How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
