Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
We don't watch enough power rangers
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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