There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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