Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize