rhymes with "ouble enetration"
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Church boner. Awkwardddd
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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