Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
