My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
