Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize
