My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
There's always time for handjobs
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
