She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
