I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize