actually, I'm a sock model
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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