You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I think I sprained my soul last night
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize