First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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