I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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