I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
