U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize