Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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