STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
