I wish I only lived at night.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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