sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
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The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
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He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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