Dual....:-)
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
When did angry sex become our thing?
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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