Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize