i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
