at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize