he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize