farters have to be the big spoon...
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
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