lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
My sheets look like a crime scene.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
