Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we still banned from the library?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize