Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
The Olympian is in my bed
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
