she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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