Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
