Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize
