You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
