The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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