I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
3pm strippers are depressing
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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