i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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