You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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