I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize