we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize