WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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